top of page
Anchor 1

Fear Of Rejection

  • Writer: Admin
    Admin
  • Mar 11, 2018
  • 4 min read

Ever get nervous about asking for something you really want? Maybe it’s a raise at work. Or maybe it’s to be in a relationship with someone. Whatever it is, if we want to create the type of life that we desire we have to learn to be comfortable with standing up for what we desire and not be apologetic or trite about it. You have desires. They’re worthy. Talk and act them out and go after what you desire. Honor thyself above all else. To do anything else is travesty and sin upon your own being.

In this article I’m going to share with you why we get scared of rejection and how to overcome the fear.

This by far is one of the worst fears that you can have in your entire life. Why? Because the fear of rejection keeps people from doing and creating not to mention BEING what they want.

When a child first comes into this world it doesn’t fear rejection. It simply just is. It does what it wants, it says what it wants, up until it is meant with a conditioned unruly adult who tells it to be otherwise by show of force or intimidation. That is our true fall from grace.

After that we then learn to play things safe lest another person gets upset or angry with us. We want to feel safe. And if life showed us in the past that if we express ourselves honestly and authentically and that potential harm can arise then we get scared and put ourselves in a box. And this is no way of living. It’s a prison. In fact, it’s a way to slowly die.

As humans we all have basic needs. We deserve to be heard, loved, and cared for and at the heart of us this is what we truly desire. The want to be recognized and validated. This is what we call as love. When someone understands and sees us without judgement. If you can learn to ask questions with true care and validate each person’s experience, then the whole world can become yours. Recognize a person’s world without judgement and they will want to give to you.

What does this have to do with the fear of rejection?

We fear rejection because we are not fully confident in our own being and our own self-worth. Our self-worth and self-esteem in ourselves is so shallow that we tell ourselves the lie that if someone rejects us then we are not worthy of being loved or truly seen. And this belief controls us so much that we are afraid to put ourselves out there and be open with the world. We wear fake masks to protect ourselves from being “harmed”.

We lie to the world and hide our true authentic self out of fear of rejection. If we get rejected then we tell ourselves, “Well you know what it was never me in the first place so it doesn’t hurt.”

What a lie!

How about we reframe rejection and view it as something that isn’t real. Let’s view it as something that is non-existent. For instance, let’s say you really love or like someone and want to have a relationship with them yet you are terrified to disclose your true feelings. You’re worried that they’ll say no. Why are you worried that they’ll say no? Because the underlying belief is that if they say no then that means you’re not worthy of love.

But what if them saying no isn’t viewed through that lens. What if we see it as someone just not wanting something based off of personal preference.

For instance, what if you go to them and disclose your true feelings and they say no. And instead of making it this dramatic thing where you are not worthy of love what if you could just tell yourself, “They just didn’t prefer me.”

Do give you a better example imagine yourself at a restaurant as a waiter. You ask the person if they want desert and they say no. Would you take it personally? No. You’d simply walk away and carry on with the day. It’s the same with someone saying that they don’t want to be with you. It’s not a rejection of who YOU are and YOUR qualities. They just have different preferences at that time in their life.

Get over the fear of rejection. It’s the best thing you can do for yourself in order to create the type of life that you want. We don’t propose business deals, upgrade our relationships, and create the life that we want out of fear of rejection.

If you can get over this fear then you’re one giant leap forward to creating the type of lifestyle that you desire.

Deepest Blessings and Pranams!

Comments


BLOG
bottom of page