Why Do I love you? What is love, it's purpose and how to get over heartbreak.

In this article I’am going to share with you why we love, the purpose of love relationships, and how to get over deep heartbreak.

Are you feeling hurt over past heartbreak? Do you feel as if you cannot go on without that other person whom you loved deeply but now the relationship is over? Are you struggling to find the purpose of why you loved such a person so deeply, only to have them leave your life?

Love is what makes us move. For most humans love is the deepest emotion that they have ever felt. And in the West we are certainly conditioned to believe that love is the ultimate goal and manifestation of life.

We hear it all the time, the purpose of life is to become ultimate love. But this is a simple statement and not clear enough because the way people think about love and what it means to be loving ranges differently because people have different types of experiences. To some love means sticking by one another no matter what, through thick and thin. To others it means always being honest with one another and knowing when to leave a relationship when it is no longer in each other’s highest interest. Love is held above everything else because to many modernized people it is the thing that has most moved us in life.

Love is, simply put, energy moving through or out our heart chakra. It is energy going out the heart or coming in. And when we experience it at the physical level we cry or feel depth within our being.

For many it is a profound and deep experience that keeps them stuck or close to one person even when it is not in their own highest interest.

We think we can only experience deep love with one person. We think and have been conditioned to believe, by all the love movies and romance media that love or true love should only be given to one person. This is actually quite a narcissistic view of love. Many people want to be the only loved one in a person’s life because they don’t know how to love themselves so if there partner or beloved loves anyone else then they get jealous and upset. This isn’t how true love works.

Love is simply life. It is impartial acceptance of all that is. It is going with the flow of life and allowing all of life to come in through your heart. True love is always honest, authentic, and open no matter what the situation is present.

If a person needs to be put in line because they’re overstepping boundaries and you put them in line then that is love. If your partner wears something that you think isn’t nice looking and then asks you, “Does this look nice?” And you reply by saying, “No I don’t like it.” Then that is authentic honest love. Some people think love is keeping their true opinions about their beloved quite because they don’t want to “hurt” them. This is a morphed form of loved passed on to you by your generations.

Many people grow up in homes where they were unconsciously taught that being loving means saving people from their own worst demons. For instance, if Mom has a problem freaking out and it is annoying and irritating everyone then everyone keeps their mouths shut so Mom doesn’t get upset and disappointed with herself. We don’t want mom to feel like a failure. So instead of us speaking our truth and telling Mom that she is being ridiculous and out of control and it’s affecting us we stuff our emotions so we don’t end up hurting her, and instead hurt ourselves.

If the above dynamic has been our understanding of love relationships then unfortunately we are doomed to attract a partner who has similar qualities until we can learn to speak our truths without fear of loss or of reprisal.

This is the true purpose of love. To evolve and expand. Love is not just some deep feeling we get with only one other person, or our family. It is living a particular way in relation to life.

It is realizing that we are here to grow and that every person who comes into contact with our being is there to teach us something, either a way of being or a way of not being. Love isn’t to be shared with one person but rather the whole world. Love, the feelings of bliss and closeness are always experienced within your body. And because you have only ever experienced these feelings with another person you think that they are your beloved. You can feel this way with anything though because the experience happens within you. If you know how to consciously open your energies up then you can feel love with anyone and anything. The thing is most people keep their energies closed off or shut down due to past traumas or societal conditioning.

The purpose of love is to make you see that you are not an individual but rather you are in constant relationship with the universe and the environment around you. There is no separation between you and another person.

It is only in your mind. When you learn to expand your awareness you will see that your body and another person’s body are similar. You both breathe the same air, drink the same water, live in the same space. Where is the difference? A loved one comes into our life to open us up to the world. They open our hearts and our beings but the purpose of this is to open us up further to the world and make ourselves all inclusive of everything. Because, everything is a part of us. There is no separation. This is what yoga truly means. To live in communion with one another. It is only in our minds that we think or believe that we are separate. The spiritual evolution of our being demands that we become more open and inclusive with life. This is part of evolution. Expansion. And in order to expand you have to become more inclusive of all things. For many people, their first love relationship is the first time they become inclusive to another person. In fact through the act of sex they use their life energies to connect their energies to another person.

Now, how to get over heartbreak. Heartbreak is this crazy feeling that we get when we lose our loved one either through breakup, life circumstances, or whatever it may be. Whatever the reason it may happen heartbreak is the best thing that can happen to you. Why? Because the purpose of heartbreak is to break your heart open to the world and make you see that you can be in love with everything.

Before heartbreak you only ever experienced those emotions with your close partner. But now you can experience that heartwarming sensational feeling with anything in the world. You learn to fall in love with the world.

You see, for most of us, our emotions control how we go about living and interacting with the world. Before heartbreak we only ever felt deep love with our partner, or children, or family. But when you really experience heartbreak and you experience incredible pain you realize that there is a joy or bliss in absolute heartbreak. The heart cracks open to the world around you and then you start to experience the emotion of love in a whole new different way. After my own heartbreak, of which I was my own creator because I was the one breaking up with the person, I learned to love the whole world. I left my last relationship because I knew that it was no longer allowing me to evolve spiritually, which is the ultimate purpose of your existence whether you can accept that or realize this yet. Even though I initiated the breakup I was heartbroken because I still deeply loved that person but I knew that in order to move on with my life and evolution I needed to separate from them in a relational way. It didn’t mean that I stopped loving them it simply meant that I learned to love the whole world and myself, to be more inclusive. My mind was very confused because I had been conditioned to believe that if you love someone then you will be with them. I had no idea that you could deeply love someone yet realize that you had to move on from them even while still loving them. So the quickest way to get over heartbreak is to change your perspective on it. It doesn’t make it any less hard and you will have to give yourself time to grieve the loss, as a relationship ending is a loss no matter how or why it goes down. But if you flip your perspective and see that the purpose of it was to teach you something about your own life and existence then you can at least keep yourself from drowning in self pity.

A final critical note here that that I want you to understand.

The feeling of love is simply an energy exchange that is happening through your heart chakra. It is energy coming in or out. You can have the experience of deeply loving a person when in fact that person’s heart is closed off or empty.

Let me explain. Let’s say you have a big heart that goes out to the world. And your partner is caliced around the edges, yet you still “love” that person immensely. You might just be “loving” them so much because in reality your actually experience the energy transfer of your own energies out the heart into theirs. Simply put, their heart isn’t open like yours is so they need to get energy from the heart of someone whose is open. They get attracted to you and when your around them your energies are being sucked out of the heart so your mind interprets this as, “Oh, I really love this person. I feel so much energy in my heart.” When in reality at the energetic level it could be that they are just taking an influx of your energies which are coming out of your heart chakra. Everything is an energetic transfer and when you look at the world through this lense then you can begin to understand how to master your energies and what is really good for you and what’s actually bad.

In the next article I will talk about the three different types of love connections and why it’s critically important to know these if you want to be happy and have successful relationships. Deepest blessings and pranamams to you!

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